Tips For Dealing With Negative People

If you follow me on social media, you may have seen my post selfie workout picture from last night.

Post Workout Picture

If you don’t follow me on social media, you should. Here’s a shameless linking to my Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram pages.

Anyways, along with the above picture, I posted the following status:

Guess what people?! SMILING and being appreciative is way easier, nevermind healthier, than complaining all the time! Tonight’s smiling post workout selfie is dedicated to just sweating off all the negative vibes around me lately.

I’m seriously struggling with the amount of naysayers in my life right now. I’m not going to use this post to ramble on and on with complaints (because then I’d be a little hypocritical, no?), but I just don’t understand how anyone can have that much to whine about. Or that much time to do it!

You know what I want to start calling these people?

Energy vampires.

Because when people are overly pessimistic, it just sucks the energy right out of you, even after your conversation or interaction is over. And lately I feel like I am surrounded by negative nancys and can’t escape. It’s like being surrounded by a bunch of walkers in The Walking Dead, except I guess then we’d be talking about energy zombies instead of energy vampires. Either way, all the negativity is leaving me drained, extra cynical, and to be honest, completely burned out.

So instead of letting all the energy vampires suck all the passion right out of me, last night I resolved to first go to the gym and get a kick ass workout, something that always helps my mood. I was awkwardly bear crawling all over the gym, through and around people giving me all sorts of weird looks. I did another bodyweight deadlift, and I felt AWESOME when I left. During my workout and on my drive home, I thought about how I can try to remove myself a bit from all the negativity bubbling up lately.

If you are dealing with something similar, whether at work or in your personal life, here are some of my tips for dealing with negative people:

  • Breathe: Sometimes taking a deep breath or two before responding to someone who has nothing positive to say can really help you stay positive yourself.
  • Empathize: Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes to see where they are coming from.
  • Don’t argue: Usually there is no rationalizing, and it just adds fuel to the fire. You might not be able to control the other person, but you can control your reaction to them.
  • Wait to respond: If you can, wait before interacting with the person. I know for me, if I let something go until the next day instead of responding right away, it helps because I’m no longer in the heat of the moment.
  • Disengage: If doing the above doesn’t work for you, simply disengage. You don’t have to get together with people who “zap you” (something we talked a LOT about at the health and wellness retreat I went to this weekend). You don’t have to respond. You simply don’t. You don’t have to give in to toxic co-workers, family members, or friends.

Aside from the above, some of my favorite strategies include hitting the gym, going for a long walk outside, listening to upbeat music, cleaning (yup!), spending time in the sun, reading, or having a glass of wine. And maybe some chocolate. Or some chips and salsa. With extra guac. 🙂

Walt Whitman Sunshine Quote

I’m not sure where to source this from, but I saw this quote on Caroline’s Instagram this morning, and it’s just what I needed to see.

Let’s chat–
Do you
have any negativity going on in your life right now? What are your tips for dealing with negative people?

Here’s to hoping this is all just lingering from Friday the 13th and the full moon last week!

20 thoughts on “Tips For Dealing With Negative People

  1. I try to stay away from the wet-blanket type people, but sometimes it’s difficult when you are surrounded by them! Sunshine and chocolate are my best cures, or even being overly positive towards the negative people, but sometimes that just makes them nastier, so best to just stay away for a while until they realize how lucky and grateful they should be. That just sucks when things like that happen, I hope things turn around for ya soon, sending smiles your way!!


  2. I’ve been dealing with a lot of this lately too. I’ve been giving myself permission to remove people on facebook (or just block them from my feed) and it’s helping. I try to remind myself that “just because someone invites you to a fight it doesn’t mean you have to go.” I figured out years ago that gossip saps my soul so whenever a conversation turns gossipy or onto topics I know are going to annoy me I just… walk away.


  3. I often feel like I get swallowed up with others negativity, it starts to wear a person down. Lately I have noticed that I too have become negative to myself – its something a friend pointed out to me. I hadn’t even noticed how my behaviour had been changing. You are 100% right on your steps, and best point of all – disengage! X


  4. I completely and 100% agree with this post! I had been dealing with a negative personality at work, and it had been wearing on me for MONTHS. That person just got let go last week, and the energy of the office has completely changed. It’s amazing how someone’s negativity can impact others. I think your strategies for dealing with it are fantastic. Keep your chin up, Athena! You are such a great role model to us all!


    • Hi Jen, thank you! It’s crazy how one person can have such a big effect on everyone else. Sounds like letting them go was the right move for sure!

      PS. Congratulations on your big news this week! I got together with Shannon yesterday, and she told me! Sending well wishes and baby love your way. 🙂


  5. We all need a reminder like this, because it’s so easy to get sucked into the negatives that people bring into situations or interactions. Workouts always help me feel better and give me a better outlook on a situation (they help dissipate the aggressive anger response I’m initially feeling!). Im glad I’m not the only one who finds cleaning therapeutic;) with a glass of wine in hand makes it even better! Hang in there- looking forward to seeing you this weekend!


  6. I love this! And I love the term “energy vampires” — it’s perfect!! There are some people at work that seriously suck the energy out of every room they walk into, and I try my best to avoid them at all costs. It’s just not worth it to me to engage in conversation with people like that, if I can help it. I would say I use your tactic of disengaging a LOT when I can, but if I have to deal with these people on a regular basis, I try to just take some deep breaths and move on as quickly as I can!


    • I hope you like “energy vampires” just as much as I liked “quad monsters” in your post last week! The wellness retreat I went to last weekend talked a lot about people who just drain the positivity right out of you, and energy vampires is the perfect way to describe it.

      Hope you are doing well and gearing up for your big day!


  7. I love this!! I have had to completely quit being around a few people because I just couldn’t handle the constant negativity. Love that you chose the gym as a way to combat all the negative junk you had to deal with!!!


  8. Pingback: F&F Friday Favorites ~ 06.20.14 | Fitness & Feta

  9. Pingback: Weekly Workout Log | Fitness & Feta

  10. Pingback: Links We Love Weekend Sendoff, June 20th | Spa Week Daily

  11. Pingback: 2014: Best of F&F | Fitness & Feta

I'd love to hear from you! Leave a comment.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s